Sunday, March 25, 2007

after I returned..

.. the journey has changed life.. more and more.. I think I know how and it becomes clear that more and more is changing. Life is all new and like it's been put in a spin at the launderette. Everything is different.

There was a young boy there. And I just found him on another blog page, by chance, I wasn't looking for him. But it reminded me of how inspiring he is. 8-9 years youger than I am but not struggling with all the burdens I had put on my plate when I was his age. Not selfconscious and panicked. He is a great example of how everyone of us could just approach life. Free from these weights..

With excitement for life, positive outlook and generosity. When did I start to listen to all the cynics.. ?
Life can seriously be beautiful, especially for us who we have such a luxury of this freedom of movement. So much more so than the majority of people around the world.

I see his photographs of his trip and wish I too had had more energy, had chose to be happier rather than so reflective and heavy inside myself all the time.

I spoke to Julian one day, a passing friend - another candian- I asked if he thinks that we have a choice to have so much energy for people, for generosity for happyness. He thinks that we almost always have a choice and that it comes down to choosing love over fear.

Choose Love instead of Fear.
Yes.
I try and remind myself.
He is right everything that I can think of really can be reduced to just that.
Love and Fear.
It is hard in our cynical, clever world to be so open about these thoughts.
Is the world really so cynical or is that me being afraid of it possibly being so?

So I am now off to get ready for art. Much needs organising for my project.
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Yoga. . I love the practice and the disciplin I am beginning to understand.. The secrets that you can only learn by not giving up.

I am just sorry that I didn't take more photographs and that I am not on any at all... next time..

As a next time there will be, not long from now, even. I am returning for some more learning, sweating, maybe crying, definitely laughing and certainly coconut water drinking. India did some magic on me. Life is changed inexplicably. Yoga really did change everything. Life, love, inspiration, perception and understanding has shifted to some place more clam and firm. All the uprooting of leaving friends and home has helped new roots to shoot. So maybe I am like a plant, cut some twiggs and there is more strength for the serious branches to reach out.